


bring down the gravel and seal my fate

by whimsyappletea



Category: Vocaloid
Genre: Alternate Universe - High School, Angst, Angst and Feels, Car Accidents, Character Death, Drama & Romance, Established Relationship, F/F, Ghosts, Grief/Mourning, Moving On, Romance, Supernatural Elements, Unrequited Love
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-08-14
Updated: 2016-08-14
Packaged: 2018-08-08 17:30:34
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,777
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/7766890
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/whimsyappletea/pseuds/whimsyappletea
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>
  <i>I don’t know you anymore. These lies of yours will consume you whole.</i>
</p>
<p>—blurring the lines between life and death. Gumimiku.</p>
            </blockquote>





	bring down the gravel and seal my fate

**Author's Note:**

> if you squint you can prolly see that _ghost rule_ was the base inspiration - at least until the original idea kinda derailed into what-just-happened territory rip
> 
> back then i drafted this in one hour and finished in two and a half - and i never did get around to editing omfg - so if the story sounds wonky theres your reason ok;; also (will smith pose at **Nerumi H** ) this lady encouraged me to go through with finishing it so thank her pls
> 
> **trigger warning** for mentions of death and general disturbing/vague material. lots of gumimiku; some implied kaitogumi, kaitomiku... also kaitorin. kaito sounds like a pimp here _pfft_
> 
> btw - most of the dialogue is in italics. entirely intentional c:

.  
.  
.

_You can’t go on like this, Miku_ , Gumi says. _You just can’t._

Miku continues to stare vacantly into the distance, where her friend Kaito is wandering through the school’s backyard with unsteady footsteps. Once he reaches the base of a large cherry blossom tree, his legs give way, letting him fall to his knees.

The pair watches in silence as another girl approaches. It’s Rin, the girl they’ve always known to have a huge personality packed into her tiny frame. She tells Kaito things Miku and Gumi can’t hear, patting his back in small, tentative circles—until he buries his head into his hands with a choked sob, allowing the small blonde to give him a comforting hug.

_Kaito deserves better. At least pay him a visit, won’t you?_ The accusation bleeds into Gumi’s warm tone. _You know he loves you._

_But I love you_ , Miku whispers. _And you know that._

Gumi doesn’t reply.

.

**bring down the gravel and seal my fate**

_mayday! go ahead and judge away, i chose to be this kind of person anyway;  
i know i’m nothing more than a wandering ghost—  
an empty shell that’s nothing but a void at most._

.

She works her jaw slowly, savouring the bland taste of her meal as much as she can before swallowing. With a sigh of deep contentment, she sets her chopsticks down and closes her eyes.

Her plate is devoid of anything, just like the gaping hole in her heart.

.

She can see Gumi frowning at her from her peripheral vision.

 _You have to eat something, Miku_, she begs. _You can’t just gulp down air and think that will fill your stomach._

The teal-haired girl doesn’t say anything for the longest time as she changes out of her school uniform and into her nightgown. Gumi has seen everything, anyway, so there’s no point in keeping up a false sense of decency.

Her body hits the bed with a soft ‘thud’, and she says, _I don’t need any food._

_I’m already dead._

.

Miku remembers it in flashes: the incoming car she didn’t think to see, the honking that came far too late, the screeching of tires against asphalt, the desperate shriek of her name, the sound of twisted metal and flesh crushing together, the pure white sheet that covered her own dead body when the police arrived—

The silence that followed, and never left.

.

Class is in session, but Miku sits in the back and no one notices a thing when she makes to drift out of the classroom like the wandering ghost she is.

But no one notices a thing either when Gumi goes after her—probably to give her space, especially since the pain from her girlfriend’s death is still a fresh, bleeding wound.

Miku doesn’t stop, Gumi doesn’t ask, and they both climb up to the rooftop without a word.

_Do you remember, Gumi_ , the teal-haired girl begins, spreading her arms as the wind blows right through her, _the first time we confessed here—with the wind in my hair, the sunset against your face, your hands in mine as we kissed?_

Gumi has her lower lip caught between her teeth, a bad habit that she has when she’s upset, and Miku wants nothing more than to banish that expression away forever. No one deserves to feel upset for someone as foolish as her, let alone kind and selfless Gumi.

_I do remember, but you’re not the Miku I fell in love with_ , she says gently. _The Miku I knew wouldn’t do this—she would take care of herself, snap out of her funk with her boundless enthusiasm and love for life. What happened to that girl, Miku?_

_She died_, Miku deadpans, offering a thin, saccharine-sweet smile.

Gumi sighs. When she reaches the doorframe of the rooftop exit, she glances back once, soft strands of hair spilling over her shoulder.

_I don’t know you anymore. These lies of yours will consume you whole._

.

_My only regret is leaving you behind, Gumi._

The green-haired girl’s eyes only grow sadder at her statement, but Miku doesn’t understand.

.

She can hear a muffled voice somewhere. It’s Kaito, she realizes. He’s crying.

 _I’m sorry_ , he says brokenly. _I knew you loved each other and I was happy for you, but I fell in love all the same. I was stupid and impulsive and I couldn’t help myself._

_No, it’s not your fault!_ comes an almost inhuman shriek from Gumi. Miku jumps up from the bed instantly. _It’s not your fault, Kaito, and you know it! Stop saying things like that!_

_If I’d known that this would happen I would’ve taken it all back in a heartbeat. I’m so sorry._

Miku runs out of the room and down the stairs just in time to see Gumi fold over on the floor with a scream of anguish. _It’s not your fault_ , she pleads. _Please, Kaito. You’ll always be my best friend no matter what you’ve done, and I forgive you for everything._

_Please._

But Kaito continues to sit on the ground just out of her reach, and he can’t seem to hear his best friend through his own tears.

.

Miku’s dead in every sense of the word and she can only comfort her girlfriend the only way she knows how: she kisses her.

Even though their lips never truly touch, the kiss tastes faintly of rusted metal and the ashes of lost souls.

.

_You can’t stay here_ , Gumi cries into her embrace. Miku hushes her and attempts to wipe her tears away with her sleeves, eyebrows furrowed at how tiny and near translucent she looks in her arms.

 _I’m not leaving_ , she tells the green-haired girl, passing a futile hand through her mussed hair to smooth it down. _I won’t leave you behind just yet._

Gumi merely shakes her head, that same sad expression clouding her eyes.

_You have to wake up, Miku. You have to realize it soon._

Miku still doesn’t understand.

.

_You can’t live like this, Kaito_ , Rin says. _You just can’t._

_I know. But it still hurts like hell, and staying here is the only way I can make amends._

Miku pauses when their indistinct voices filter through her thoughts. She doesn’t know why she keeps hearing them everywhere she goes; it’s like they’re always there with her—right down to Rin saying something eerily similar to Gumi’s statement from three weeks back.

Even so, she still keeps quiet to listen in on their heated conversation.

_It wasn’t your fault, Kaito! It was an ACCIDENT!_

_If I hadn’t asked Miku to meet me at the park after school to apologize for my forced kiss, the accident wouldn’t have happened in the first place! HOW IS THAT NOT MY FAULT, RIN?_

_YOU WEREN’T THERE WHEN IT HAPPENED, KAITO_ , Rin snarls with surprising ferocity. Miku has never heard Rin raise her voice this loud before, and it’s frightening. _You weren’t the one driving the fucking car, how can you—_

_You don’t understand_ , Kaito whispers hoarsely. _I’m the one who killed her, Rin._

_I’m the one who got my own best friend killed._

And finally, Miku understands.

.  
.

( _I don’t know what he’s going to say._ Miku’s thoughts were racing as fast as her own two feet as she hurried down the pavement, wringing her hands in worry. _I mean, yeah, I texted Gumi to be there for moral support, sure, but who knows what will happen._

_Can we even be friends after this? God, I’m such a useless lesbian—why would you fall in love with me at all, Kaito?_

In her haste to reach the park and resolve the tense situation as soon as possible, the teal-haired girl decided to take a shortcut, crossing the small road with her mind preoccupied by everything else but road safety, and—

_BEEEEEEEEEEP!_

She froze in the middle of the road, staring wide-eyed at the car rushing towards her at top speed without any signs of stopping, oh god she was going to die this was it this was the end she never got to tell Gumi she loved her one last ti—

_MIKU!_

Someone shoved her aside with bruising force, sending her sprawling towards the ground. Her head smashed against a large, sharp rock by the roadside with a sickening ‘thud’.

The last thing she saw before everything went black was the hazy image of green hair and a pool of blood.)

.  
.

_Miku._

The teal-haired girl doesn’t turn around, doesn’t reply. She’s afraid to.

_Miku, please._

_You’re dead_ , Miku murmurs numbly. _You saved me._

Gumi wraps her arms around Miku’s waist with wordless, achingly gentle care, and she inhales sharply, feeling the sting of tears at the corners of her eyes.

_Yes. You’ve finally realized._

Rin and Kaito have disappeared along with the school setting and everything else they’ve known; all that surrounds them now is a sea of darkness waiting to consume them whole.

_Should you have fallen deeper into your own lies of comfort in death, you would’ve been beyond saving._

_Then you should’ve let me be_ , Miku breathes, closing her eyes. _I would’ve wanted to join you anyway._

Gumi moves forward to cup her face in her hands, and for the first time since Miku’s supposed death, she can feel the warmth seeping into her skin, real and true.

_I wouldn’t have let you. I adore you too much to take you with me_ , she says. There’s so much kindness and overflowing affection in her voice that Miku can’t help letting out a quiet sob.

_But it’s time now, and you have to go._

Miku hiccups, crying too hard to voice her disapproval. She shakes her head in equal parts stubbornness and desperation, but Gumi presses a sweet kiss to her forehead—one last parting gift.

_I love you, Miku. Don’t lie anymore._

_I’ll always be with you._

And the silence that never left shatters at last.

.

_mayday! tell them who i really am, since everything i know’s about to meet its end—  
mayday! tell me who i really am,  
did you figure out the me you knew was just a sham?_

.

“—oh my god, she’s waking up! Rin, get the doctor! _Get the doctor!_ ”

“I’ve pressed the call button already, they’re on the way! Hey, Miku, can you hear me? Miku?”

“Miku, it’s... it’s Kaito. Please say something.”

The teal-haired girl blinks up at the concerned, tear-stained faces of her friends. Notices the white walls of the hospital room she’s in, the bandages wrapped around her head, the sheets coarse beneath her fingers.

Something wet trickles down her cheek, unbidden, and she smiles.

_I love you too, Gumi._

“Yeah, guys, I’m alive.”

_Thank you._

.  
 **owari.**  
.  
.  
.

**Author's Note:**

>  **disclaimer:** i do not own Vocaloid, or Hatsune Miku’s _Ghost Rule_ (translyrics by rachie).


End file.
